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Magician's Assistant
Feb. 10th, 2008 12:37 pmFriday, my school hosted a magic show. The Magestic is the one black magician in central Ohio, and it was sort of sad to hear even African American students say "So where's the magician?" when he came out on stage. As if being black meant he had no mojo.
Like any good magician, this one depended on calling up folks from the audience to do tricks up close to stun and amaze. One required the use of a knife, so a director of student services at the ranch, Jim, asked me ahead of time to be the adult helper. I mean, hey, they needed someone who wasn't afraid to come up on stage and would be willing to look silly. My name came immediately to mind. Hmmm. Typecast.
So, up on stage, with my hands folded primly in front of my stomach, I listen while the magician asks if I've ever heard of the trick where I pick a card, and then he throws the deck in the air, then spears it with the knife. I say I have. Well, this isn't that trick.
Instead, the Magestic explains, I'm to pick a card, show it to the audience (it's a BIG size deck of cards, easily read from the back row) and place it randomly back in the deck. I do. It's the seven of spades. Shuffle the deck. Then, I'm to put my hand on the deck of cards, and he'll use the knife to strike a blow through my fingers. The card speared will be revealed to be my card. I promptly put both hands behind my back, and the crowd laughs.
I allow myself to be persuaded to place my hand on the deck of cards. The Magestic starts waving his knife high in the air, and when he lifts it higher, like he might strike, I call out in my best stage voice (easily reaching the back row, where my boss is sitting,) "Mr. Michael, if one of my fingers is chopped off, this *is* covered by workman's comp, right?" The crowd laughs, and Mr. Michael says "Yes, certainly. Go ahead." I smile breezily at the Magestic, whose smile is a little forced, because I've interrupted his timing.
So, again, the Magestic lifts his knife hand to strike, and again, I call out in my best stage voice, (signing with my left hand as I speak, leaving the other on the cards) "You know I use sign language, so I need *all* of my fingers, right?" The crowd laughs again, and waves their hands high in the air like Kermit the frog introducing the Muppet show - this is deaf applause (because deaf people cannot hear applause, but they can see this).
The Magestic pauses just a moment, then grins hugely. "Oh, you need ALL of your fingers for sign language, huh? Well, then, maybe you'll need some protection. Let me get you a glove." Out he pulls an itty bitty glove from earlier in the show, where another volunteer has "shrunk" it with a magic wand improvised from a magic marker. (The student's magic word? "Riddiculous." Someone has read his Harry Potter.) We have some shtick making the itty bitty glove bigger, and I don the bright red knit glove, and I place my begloved hand back on the cards.
"So, this glove will protect me?" I ask brightly.
"No," the Magestic says equally brightly, with a maniacal grin, "but the color will hide the bloodstains nicely." The knife flashes down, and I yip like a girlie girl. It comes nowhere near me or the cards. I am somewhat amazed that my hand is still on the cards, actually. The crowd laughs again. The Magestic, having gained control of his trick and his shtick, regains his patter.
"No, no, no," he says sorrowfully. "This just isn't going to work. Gimme the glove." I give him the glove, and he dons it. He hands me the knife, and puts *his* hand on the cards. "Now you go ahead," he tells me. The crowd laughs. "You want *me* to do this thing?" I squeak. "Depends on what you think 'this thang' is, girl," the Magestic says. "Go get your card."
So here's where I wasn't thinking. I actually thought the trick would actually be stabbing the knife through at *least* the top card, which would magically be the seven of spades. So I raise the knife and with a lightning strike, slam the blade down between the Magestic's red begloved fingers. The Magestic lets out a yip remarkably like mine, and scoots his hand back from the knife (a pointy butter knife, which looks far sharper from the audience than it actually is) sticking up through from where it has punctured some of his cards. The actual assistant doing the sound stuff from the side of the stage laughs in disbelief, and the Magestic rolls his eyes at me, momentarily disconcerted.
"Without a magic *word*?" the Magestic recovers, in full personae. "No, no, no," he says, prying the knife from the cards, and running his thumb over the hole. He hands me the knife again. (I am surprised he's letting me have it again, and judging by the number of "no ways" and shuffling from the audience, so are they.) "Let's try this a different way." As he reshuffles the cards, he explains he wants me to insert my magic knife sideways ANYWHERE in the deck, and it will be attracted to MY card, which we will show the audience.
The Magestic holds the deck in both hands lengthwise towards me, the over-sized card tops facing me, at a comedic arm's length away. The audience laughs sympathetically. I look the magician in the eye, and he nods at me. Okay. I salute him like a three Musketeer with my magic knife, and like an epee, I thrust home into the side of the deck of cards, spearing one neatly on the tip of the knife by splitting it in half between it's glued edges. The Magestic's eyes bug in horror. I bend over sideways, lifting the knife up, and take a look at the card. It's my card - the seven of spades! I try to get it, so I can show the audience how I got my card, speared on my knife, how kewl~! I see the ten of hearts and a diamond card, too, so the deck isn't made up of all of my card, either.
But of course, that isn't how the trick is supposed to work, and the Magestic doesn't think I got the right card, so we have a bit of a tug of war with the deck of cards before we set up to try again. No shuffling, just wrenched away from me. The Magestic regroups. "When I say to cut the cards, dear, I mean *gently* insert the knife between the cards. Anywhere." His eyes do not leave mine, and are very intense. He's not smiling anymore. I, very sure of where I put the knife the *last* time I speared my seven of spades, deliberately slide my knife in a completely different spot. (Hey, he wrecked what *I* thought was amazing and kewl, why help now?) The Magestic pulls the deck open from where my knife was inserted, slowly, so the audience can see, there's my card! It has a hole slit in the middle of it, and the edge is mangled from where the knife slid in, the seven of spades!
"Give a hand for Ms. Judi, y'all" says the Magestic, bowing to me (I curtsy back to him) and ushers me grandly from the stage, with a tight little smile.
So, thinking about this trick, what gets me the most is that I actually *did* spear the card with the knife, not once, but twice, before the Magestic did whatever sleight of hand to reveal my card to the world. After the show, I stopped by the stage to talk with the Magestic and thanked him for letting me be part of the show. "But why wouldn't you let me show my card that first time? I got a look at it, and it was the seven of spades I got," I said. The assistant's eyes bugged out real big (no WAY!). The Magestic said, suavely, "Is that so? Must be - magic!"
Like any good magician, this one depended on calling up folks from the audience to do tricks up close to stun and amaze. One required the use of a knife, so a director of student services at the ranch, Jim, asked me ahead of time to be the adult helper. I mean, hey, they needed someone who wasn't afraid to come up on stage and would be willing to look silly. My name came immediately to mind. Hmmm. Typecast.
So, up on stage, with my hands folded primly in front of my stomach, I listen while the magician asks if I've ever heard of the trick where I pick a card, and then he throws the deck in the air, then spears it with the knife. I say I have. Well, this isn't that trick.
Instead, the Magestic explains, I'm to pick a card, show it to the audience (it's a BIG size deck of cards, easily read from the back row) and place it randomly back in the deck. I do. It's the seven of spades. Shuffle the deck. Then, I'm to put my hand on the deck of cards, and he'll use the knife to strike a blow through my fingers. The card speared will be revealed to be my card. I promptly put both hands behind my back, and the crowd laughs.
I allow myself to be persuaded to place my hand on the deck of cards. The Magestic starts waving his knife high in the air, and when he lifts it higher, like he might strike, I call out in my best stage voice (easily reaching the back row, where my boss is sitting,) "Mr. Michael, if one of my fingers is chopped off, this *is* covered by workman's comp, right?" The crowd laughs, and Mr. Michael says "Yes, certainly. Go ahead." I smile breezily at the Magestic, whose smile is a little forced, because I've interrupted his timing.
So, again, the Magestic lifts his knife hand to strike, and again, I call out in my best stage voice, (signing with my left hand as I speak, leaving the other on the cards) "You know I use sign language, so I need *all* of my fingers, right?" The crowd laughs again, and waves their hands high in the air like Kermit the frog introducing the Muppet show - this is deaf applause (because deaf people cannot hear applause, but they can see this).
The Magestic pauses just a moment, then grins hugely. "Oh, you need ALL of your fingers for sign language, huh? Well, then, maybe you'll need some protection. Let me get you a glove." Out he pulls an itty bitty glove from earlier in the show, where another volunteer has "shrunk" it with a magic wand improvised from a magic marker. (The student's magic word? "Riddiculous." Someone has read his Harry Potter.) We have some shtick making the itty bitty glove bigger, and I don the bright red knit glove, and I place my begloved hand back on the cards.
"So, this glove will protect me?" I ask brightly.
"No," the Magestic says equally brightly, with a maniacal grin, "but the color will hide the bloodstains nicely." The knife flashes down, and I yip like a girlie girl. It comes nowhere near me or the cards. I am somewhat amazed that my hand is still on the cards, actually. The crowd laughs again. The Magestic, having gained control of his trick and his shtick, regains his patter.
"No, no, no," he says sorrowfully. "This just isn't going to work. Gimme the glove." I give him the glove, and he dons it. He hands me the knife, and puts *his* hand on the cards. "Now you go ahead," he tells me. The crowd laughs. "You want *me* to do this thing?" I squeak. "Depends on what you think 'this thang' is, girl," the Magestic says. "Go get your card."
So here's where I wasn't thinking. I actually thought the trick would actually be stabbing the knife through at *least* the top card, which would magically be the seven of spades. So I raise the knife and with a lightning strike, slam the blade down between the Magestic's red begloved fingers. The Magestic lets out a yip remarkably like mine, and scoots his hand back from the knife (a pointy butter knife, which looks far sharper from the audience than it actually is) sticking up through from where it has punctured some of his cards. The actual assistant doing the sound stuff from the side of the stage laughs in disbelief, and the Magestic rolls his eyes at me, momentarily disconcerted.
"Without a magic *word*?" the Magestic recovers, in full personae. "No, no, no," he says, prying the knife from the cards, and running his thumb over the hole. He hands me the knife again. (I am surprised he's letting me have it again, and judging by the number of "no ways" and shuffling from the audience, so are they.) "Let's try this a different way." As he reshuffles the cards, he explains he wants me to insert my magic knife sideways ANYWHERE in the deck, and it will be attracted to MY card, which we will show the audience.
The Magestic holds the deck in both hands lengthwise towards me, the over-sized card tops facing me, at a comedic arm's length away. The audience laughs sympathetically. I look the magician in the eye, and he nods at me. Okay. I salute him like a three Musketeer with my magic knife, and like an epee, I thrust home into the side of the deck of cards, spearing one neatly on the tip of the knife by splitting it in half between it's glued edges. The Magestic's eyes bug in horror. I bend over sideways, lifting the knife up, and take a look at the card. It's my card - the seven of spades! I try to get it, so I can show the audience how I got my card, speared on my knife, how kewl~! I see the ten of hearts and a diamond card, too, so the deck isn't made up of all of my card, either.
But of course, that isn't how the trick is supposed to work, and the Magestic doesn't think I got the right card, so we have a bit of a tug of war with the deck of cards before we set up to try again. No shuffling, just wrenched away from me. The Magestic regroups. "When I say to cut the cards, dear, I mean *gently* insert the knife between the cards. Anywhere." His eyes do not leave mine, and are very intense. He's not smiling anymore. I, very sure of where I put the knife the *last* time I speared my seven of spades, deliberately slide my knife in a completely different spot. (Hey, he wrecked what *I* thought was amazing and kewl, why help now?) The Magestic pulls the deck open from where my knife was inserted, slowly, so the audience can see, there's my card! It has a hole slit in the middle of it, and the edge is mangled from where the knife slid in, the seven of spades!
"Give a hand for Ms. Judi, y'all" says the Magestic, bowing to me (I curtsy back to him) and ushers me grandly from the stage, with a tight little smile.
So, thinking about this trick, what gets me the most is that I actually *did* spear the card with the knife, not once, but twice, before the Magestic did whatever sleight of hand to reveal my card to the world. After the show, I stopped by the stage to talk with the Magestic and thanked him for letting me be part of the show. "But why wouldn't you let me show my card that first time? I got a look at it, and it was the seven of spades I got," I said. The assistant's eyes bugged out real big (no WAY!). The Magestic said, suavely, "Is that so? Must be - magic!"
