Monster Mom

[judifilksign]

I was at Toys R Us, having Sparkle pick out a toy for a friend's birthday party.  She'd picked out Dr. Girlfriend, and I was hinting that perhaps a different toy might be better (as neither eight-year-old has ever seen Venture Brothers, and aren't likely to in the future, and I wasn't sure a "Dr.  Girlfriend" would go over well.)

We still had Dr. Girlfriend in the cart, though, dressed in her hot pink Jackie O outfit.  Sparkle stops at the Monster High dolls.  Another little girl says to her very coiffed mother, "Here they are, mom!"

The mother looks at the Monster High dolls skeptically.  "They're kindof creepy," she says disdainfully.  "Like creepy Barbies.  Who makes creepy Barbies?  Why would they even make creepy Barbies?"  She turns to me.  "Do you know why they even make these things like this?"

I say, "Each doll is different from Barbie.  I think the idea is that if you have a doll you love that is really different, and play with them along with your traditional Barbies, then you'll be more likely to think different is okay, and play with different kids."

"I don't want my kids to play with kids like that." the mother stated flatly.

I stood blinking at her, somewhat stunned.  I mean, that's the kind of statement someone might make inside their head, but out loud like that?  Wow.  I didn't know what to do with it and still be nice.  I found myself wondering if the mother was being that way because she could tell Sparkle was different, or because she couldn't.  (Either bad.)

The little girl pointed to the werewolf doll.  "Pleeeease, Mommy?"

"No!" barks the mother.

The little girl turns wistfully to Sparkle, as if seeking support.

"I'm sorry," says Sparkle.  "Your mommy doesn't want you to be friends with me."  And Sparkle took the Cleo (Mummy's daughter) doll for the party.  Stunned, I trailed in Sparkle's wake, thinking there was nothing else I could say, or wanted to, to top that.

Comments

[daisy-knotwise.livejournal.com]

I don't know the dolls you are speaking of, but I think you may be judging the mom a bit harshly. You may see people who are different, another ethnicity, or differently abled. She may not be a fan of the current fantasies, but sees the dolls as monsters, scary, nasty, Hammer Films kind of monsters.
To her they might fall into the category of snakes, spiders and public speaking.

For instance, Zombies are popular right now. They are considered fun. They make me very uncomfortable. You can have fun with zombies. I'll find other things to do, thank you. Does this make me evil?

We don't know what pushes other people's buttons.
GHR

[chryssalys]

I can see your point there, but the statement from the other mother in direct reply to what Judi said? It comes across as a blatant "my kids are to play with kids just like themselves" statement, IMO. She didn't say she didn't want them to play with dolls like that, she said she didn't want them to play with *kids* like that.

[scifantasy.livejournal.com]

I think you've possibly thought more about what that mother said than she did. Which cuts both ways, of course, in that on the one hand, she didn't think, she just spoke, and that can be revealing; on the other, she probably didn't really think about what Judi said either.

[judifilksign.livejournal.com]

Yeah, a lot of not-thinking can make the world a not-fun place, sometimes.

I kind of hope that she heard what Sparkle said though, and maybe thought a little more.

Not that it makes a huge difference in my immediate world; she isn't someone I know or have to deal with on a constant basis or anything.

[chryssalys]

It could be that I'm thinking more about what she said than she did. But that just comes down to - she didn't think. And that's the real problem, isn't it?

[judifilksign.livejournal.com]

That is clearly the message Sparkle got. I see where Daisy is coming from, too, though.

And now, from the mouths of babes, maybe she's heard herself, and given it another thought.

Although I don't think her kiddo can count on a monster doll any time soon.

[chryssalys]

LOL! Likely not.

[judifilksign.livejournal.com]

It was certainly clear she thought the dolls were creepy.

Seanan posted a link recently that talked about a trend right now of pretty teen dead girls on young adult books. Looking at library sites and talking to folks, there are a lot of people disturbed by that trend.

She may not want her kids to play with kids that like creepy things.

I guess I'm just really glad that she was a random mom in the store, instead of someone I knew.

Never thought of you as evil, and your statement "You can have fun with zombies. I'll find other things to do, thank you," reinforces that, because you aren't enforcing your discomfort/dislike on other people's fun. (Mother rules excepted for all us mothers, of course.)

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

I think Sparkle hit the nail on the head, really.

Otherwise the mom would have said "Oh wait, that's not what I meant. I just don't like zombies or werewolves."

I mean, isn't that what you would have said?

[sheistheweather]

I am truly impressed at Sparkle's seeming assessment of the situation.